Tuesday, March 11, 2008

maximum death

ah, tuesday. my monday. how the hell are ya? it seems like it's been ages since we've seen each other. what's that? you like my tie? well, that's a pretty strange thing to say, mr. tuesday. you know i don't wear ties. you must have had a bit too much of mr. cotton's candy. i think your delirious. have a seat. hey, listen buddy- i was wondering if you could do me a favor. could you keep your dick out of my ass for at least one 24 hour period? i know we only see each other weekly, but sometimes you're a little rough around the edges if you catch my drift.

gross.

here was my weekend:
FRIDAY: thrashed hard in freezing basement. it was drunk in there. a little too drunk, if you know what i mean.
SATURDAY: it was definitely too drunk in there. pounding head/suicidal thoughts all day. worth it. that night, i went to see street legal at george's house. then i ended up somewhere i never thought i'd ever be again.
SUNDAY: joy and i saw semi-pro and loved it (for the most part). ate food.

HEY! i saw the shining last night for free at the tivoli. seen it before, but never on the big screen. great flick. shelly long's performance is first annoying as hell and then hilariously terrifying (see: running up the steps with a knife, flailing her arms around like an octopus thrown in a fryer). i found out that right before that movie was made, jack nicholson discovered that his sister was his mother, and his mother was his grandma. that would be quite a mind-fuck at 40 years old, i'd imagine. at least he still had morticia. then he went crazy on cocaine. THEN he made the shining. if you've seen it, then you'll understand what i mean when i say that it's full of "kubrick-isms." these delightful little 'choices' (aka 'fuck-ups') throughout the film add a lot of mystery. for instance, why the hell would jack be the caretaker in 1921? makes no sense. wasn't in the book. that was a lot of kubrick's shtick, i guess...leaving everything open-ended. say what you want about his artistic liberties, but you CANNOT fuck with that guy when it comes to the technical side of making movies. i bet that dude could have taken apart any camera and put it back together himself. only better.
what a psycho, huh?

i'm going to chicago in 3 days!

p.s.- serpentor has to change our name. any ideas? i believe the only thing currently on the table is KILLMEISTER. i wonder how meister would feel about that.

6 comments:

John LaPointe Navarre said...

"the blacks and the blues" is a name i thought up the other day. it doesn't quite fit with a metal band though. maybe shitwave, dickwave, hellwave, asswave, wanggrave or wicked basket? those are all gold. YOU KNOW THAT I'M RIGHT.

ps. THE INTERNET

tornado bait said...

bloodpile, just make it the name already. or one of those names from mst3k. hah.

"then i ended up somewhere i never thought i'd ever be again."
--where?

can't wait to see you you crazy bastard.

tornado bait said...

WANGGRAVE!?!?!?!?

Steve Harvey Oswald said...

possible names for serpentor:
Bloodfart
Gay Man With Lawn Mower
The Freelance Advertising Consultants (taken)
Sykk Blud Killurz
Knifefuck
Usurper of Herod's Throne
Dominoh no you don't
Within The Gryphon's Clutch
Silvur Angur Pindent

Anonymous said...

I didn't think you'd ever be there again either.

There Will Be Blood
House of Deadly
Skullfuck
King Terror
Reap Me
Whoris
Sheriffs of Rottingham
The Game of Knife
Deaf Goldblum
Tyrannosaurus Wrecks
Gilbert Goddbleed
Gilbert Modfried

Fuck it, I'm tired.

Call your band Gil Korpi

Anonymous said...

Gag Reflex

Boss Hole Blues Band

Dick Wicker and the Wickets

Gil Corpi Resurrection

Blind Hole